Scent

I think it's best to wear two different deodorants, one for each armpit

But that's just my two scents

Hit by a fastball

A man walks into his kitchen with his hands between his legs and a pained expression on his face. "what happened darling?" says his wife. "I got hit with a fastball at practice" he replies. "Oh you poor man, come here and i'll massage it better". So she pulls out his penis and begins to massage with various scented oils. "how's that my darling, are you feeling better?" The man examines his bruised finger and says: "That's great darling, but I still think i'll lose the nail."

I accidentally sprayed deodorant in my mouth this morning.

Now when I talk I have this weird axe scent.

People say I'm crazy for trying to invent a mind-controlled air freshener...

but it makes scents when you think about it.

My friend told me about his idea for odorless candles

I told him they wouldn't make any scents

I was offered sex from a 21 year old woman...

In exchange, I was supposed to advertise some kind of bathroom cleaner. Of course I declined, because I am a person of high moral standards and strong willpower. Just as strong as Ajax, the super strong bathroom cleaner. Now available with scented lemon and vanilla.