Statistics jokes

Statistics is like a bikini on a beautiful woman...

... what it reveals is exciting; what it hides is vital.

I’ll do algebra, I’ll do trigonometry, I’ll even do statistics.

But graphing is where I draw the line!

44% of Marriages end in divorce.

That means 56% of marriages are fatal. I love statistics.

When are minorities not minorities?

When you look at crime statistics.

When a statistician passes the airport security check, they discover a bomb in his bag. He explains. "Statistics shows that the probability of a bomb being on an airplane is 1/1000. However, the chance that there are two bombs at one plane is 1/1000000. So, I am much safer..."