Color

Smoking marijuana has imbued me with cat-like abilities.

For example, just one brightly colored piece of paper can now entertain me for hours.

Why did Hitler fail as an artist?

He refused to mix colors.

50 shades of grey

\#4e5054, #272727, #282828, #292929, #2b2b2b, #2c2c2c, #2e2e2e, #313131, #323232, #343434, #353535, #373737, #393939, #3a3a3a, #3c3c3c, #3f3f3f, #404040, #424242, #444444, #454545, #474747, #484848, #4a4a4a, #4b4b4b, #4d4d4d, #4e4e4e, #505050, #515151, #535353, #565656, #575757, #585858, #595959, #5b5b5b, #5c5c5c, #5e5e5e, #616161, #626262, #646464, #656565, #676767, #6a6a6a, #6b6b6b, #6c6c6c, #6d6d6d, #6f6f6f, #727272, #737373, #757575, #767676

Why does Batman just wear dark colors?

Easy. Batman doesn’t want to get shot.

Why does Robin just wear bright colors?

Easy. Batman doesn’t want to get shot

If you had $1 for every time you've masturbated

What color would your Bugatti be?

What do you call a color that doesn't exist?

A pigment of your imagination.

The colors red, white, and blue are the colors of freedom. Until they are flashing behind you.

I thought my vasectomy would keep my wife from getting pregnant, but apparently it just changes the color of the baby.

Two Jews are arguing before the Rabbi

J1: "Black is a color!"

J2: "NO! it is not!"

J1: "It is a color!"

J2: "Rabbi, is black a color?"

Rabbi: "Well, sure..."

J1: "See, I told you. And so is white!"

J2: "White is not a color!"

J1: "Rabbi?"

Rabbi: "Well, yes, white is a color"

J1: "See, I told you Moishe, I sold you a *color* TV"

What’s it called when a chameleon can’t change its colors anymore?

A reptile dysfunction!

A ventriloquist is performing with his dummy on his lap

He’s telling a dumb-blonde joke when a young platinum-haired beauty jumps to her feet.

“What gives you the right to stereotype blondes that way?” she demands. “What does hair color have to do with my worth as a human being?”

Flustered, the ventriloquist begins to stammer out an apology.

“You keep out of this!” she yells. “I’m talking to that little jerk on your knee!”

I made a sideshow of guessing whether you're right or left handed just by asking your favorite color.

I'm very proud of my 90% success rate.

Ugh. They stopped selling "skin color" Crayons.

I guess I can still draw people when my Crayons run out, but albino more.

My chameleon couldn’t change colors, so I took him to the vet...

Poor guy was diagnosed with ereptile dysfunction.

In breaking news, Trump’s personal library has burned down.

The fire consumed both books and in a tragic twist he hadn’t even finished coloring the second one.