France jokes

Why do the Romans use more eggs in their omelets than the French?

Because the Romans feel that when it comes to eggs, you can't have too many ovum.

But in France, they believe that one egg is un ouef.

Did you know that French fries weren't first cooked in France?

They were cooked in Greece.

My daughter told me to treat her like a princess...

so I made her marry a man she has never met before in order to secure an alliance with France.

A man from France, a man from Britain, and a man from New York are on an expedition to the Amazon Forest. After a while, they get lost. As they are walking, suddenly the bushes jump up into the air, and men with spears are there. One man says, "Hey, you're in our sacred land. So what we are going to do is skin you and then use your flesh to make canoes. But we aren't that crazy so we will let you choose how you die." The man from France said, "Bring me the poison." The man from Britain said, "Bring me the gun." And the man from New York said, "Bring me a fork." The guy was confused with the fork but still brought the items and gave them to them. The guy from France said, "For France!" And drank the poison and died. The man from Britain said, "Long live the queen!" And shot himself and died. And the man from New York started stabbing himself with the fork and said, "MAKE A CANOE OUT OF THIS YOU FUCKERS!"

I don't see what's so offensive about calling someone from Pakistan a Paki...

It's like calling someone from Scotland a Scot, an Australian an Aussie or someone from France a cunt

France and Italy go to war. Who wins?

Neither. France surrenders and Italy switches sides

If electricity follows the path of least resistance...

Why doesn't lightning only strike in France?

A German tourist comes to France

...a border control asks him

"Occupation?"

German: No just visiting.

Why is EA the worst gaming company in America?

Because Ubisoft is in France.