French jokes

What do you get when you throw a grenade inside a French bathroom?

Linoleum Blonaparte :)

Why do french tanks have rear view mirrors?

To see the battle.

Why did the French guy only eat one egg?

Because one egg is un oeuf.

I am absolutely exhausted from my French self-defense class.

I've never run so far in my life.

Do you know what French people smoke?

Oui’d.

An English man, French ,Italian and German are standing at the side of a street watching a street performer.

The street performer noticed that they all have poor eye sight so he asked them whether they can see him and they responded: "Yes" "Oui" "Sì" "Ja"

Massaging the wife

Italian : Last night I massaged my wife with the finest olive oil, then we made love and I made her scream non stop 5 minutes.

French : Last night I massaged my wife with special aphrodisiac oil, then we made passionate love. I made her scream 15 minutes.

American : Thats nothing! Last night I massaged my wife with cheese, then made love and made her scream for 2 hours.

Italian and French, astonished : 2 hours ! How !?

American : I wiped my hands on the curtains...