Packet

I dressed up as a UDP packet for Halloween...

...but I don’t think anyone got it.

A cowboy is buying condoms.

"Give me 3 packets of condoms, please" he says. "Do you need a paper bag with that, sir?" asks the cashier. "Nah, she's purty good-lookin ..."

“Doc, I ate one of those ‘Do not Eat’ silica packets. Am I going to die??”

Doctor: Well, everyone is going to die eventually.

Man: Everyone?? Holy shit, what have I done?

2 guys walk into a bar

"Hey donkey get the beers in" shouts one guy to the other.

The man walks up to the barman and stutters " two bee... two bee... two beers please?" the barman starts to pour the mans beer when the guys friend shouts "Donkey! get me some nuts too"

The man stood at the bar says to the barman " two pa... two pa.. two packets of nuts too please"

The barman says to the guy "That's a bit mean, why does he call you donkey?" and the man replies "It's OK, He aw... he aw.. he always calls me that"