This Halloween I decided to go as a harp. As I walked into the party, a gentleman asked, "what are you supposed to be?"
"A harp", I replied. "No, no. You're much too small to be a harp" he protested. So I asked, "are you calling me a lyre?"
I dressed up as a UDP packet for Halloween...
...but I don’t think anyone got it.
What is a Halloween themed Fleshlight called?
A Jackoff-lantern.
Why do engineers mix up Halloween and Christmas?
Because OCT 31=DEC 25
When it's been Halloween for a few months but there's still a body hanging from your neighbor's tree.
What’s a hillbillies favourite thing to do on Halloween?
Pump Kin
This will be my first Halloween as a single person in over 12 years.
I think I’ll dress up as Southwest Airlines and fuck a bunch of people.
TIL Jehovah's Witnesses don't celebrate halloween..
guess they don't appreciate random people knocking on their doors
Mozart, Beethoven, and Schwarzenegger are getting ready to throw a Halloween party. Mozart turns to Arnie and asks, "what's your costume going to be?"
"I'll be Bach"
On Halloween, a little boy dressed as a pirate.
He went up to a house and rang the doorbell. A man answered and said, "Well I'll be, a pirate! But where are your buccaneers? The little boy replied, "Under my buckin' hat."
How can you tell a girl ghost from a boy ghost?
Boooooooobs!
You’re welcome.
Happy Halloween everybody!