Peanut jokes

I once dated a girl who told me she had had sex with Mr. Peanut.

She was fucking nuts.

An Anteater walks into a bar....

Bartender says "can I get you a drink" "Nooooooooooooooooooooo" "How about something to eat?" "Nooooooooooooooooooooo" "What about some peanuts?" "Nooooooooooooooooooooo"

Frazzled, the bartender says "What's with the long no's"? Anteater replies "I was born with it".

I saw a guy with his dick in a jar of peanut butter

... he was fucking nuts.

An old lady Offers the bus driver some peanuts to which he happily eats....

Every five minutes she gives him more peanuts... Driver: why don't you eat them yourself? Old lady: I can't chew I have no teeth look! Driver: Then why do you buy them? Old lady: Oh I just like the chocolate around them.