Astronaut

An astronaut says to his friend: 'I can't find any milk for my coffee'

The friend replies 'In space, no one can. Here, use cream.'

What do you call a black guy in outer space?

An astronaut you racist bastard.

What did the astronaut say to his girlfriend?

I need space.

Putin has boasted that Russia is planning to build a base on the moon

The idea is that astronauts will live there permanently. When they were asked if they really wanted to spend the rest of their lives in a barren, lifeless, empty landscape, the Russians said...

"No. That's why we want to go to the moon."

A woman astronaut calls her base: -Houston we have a problem. -What is it? -Nothing...