Belief jokes

To prevent the spread of germs, people have been told to sneeze into their upper arm. Instead, people have been stockpiling toilet paper.

This upholds the long standing belief that too many people don't know their arse from their elbow.

I call my penis Tom Cruise.

It does all its own stunts, has questionable beliefs, and I have to use camera tricks to make it look taller.

I refused to believe I was gay AND dyslexic.

I was in Daniel.

If I was god I would be an atheist

Because I do not believe in myself

Funny unknown historical fact:

Pharoahs were burried with their hands crossed their chest because it was a historical belief there would be countless water slides in the after life.

Go away bee, don't bother me.

A wise man once told me, if a bee is bothering you, don't swat or run away, just stand still and look right at it, because seeing is believing.