Plate jokes

Going into my son's room is the same as going to Ikea

You go in just to see what's new and come out with 10 plates 3 cups and a pair of socks.

We should stop making fun of fat people

They have too much on their plate already

Fat shaming is wrong.

They have enough on their plate already.

one tectonic plated bumped into another...

"Sorry my fault"

I tried to submit a patent for a gold-plated, Bluetooth-ready butt plug, but Steve Jobs beat me to it.

It turns out he's already making overpriced toys for assholes!

An old man is at home on his death bed

When suddenly he smells something amazing. It's the smell of his favorite chocolate chip cookies. And with his last strength, he gets out of bed, and he goes to the kitchen, where his wife of 50 years, is cooking these beautiful chocolate chip cookies. And they are on a plate of four of them, just out of the oven. And with his last human strength, he reaches over to take one of the cookies, and his wife sees him, she rushes over, she slaps his hand, and she says, "No, they are for the funeral."