Brains jokes

I'm a 5G installation engineer and people are constantly accusing me with bizarre conspiracy theories, such as how 5G is giving them headaches, or killing their sperm. I think they are completely crazy.

4G must've fried their brains.

I wasn't originally going to get a brain transplant...

but then I changed my mind.

What did the preacher say at the vegetable mass?

“Lettuce pray for peas on Earth.”

Then

“Why do I bother with puns, everyone here’s brain dead.”

I told the doctor I didn’t want brain surgery. But he changed my mind.

Happy Anniversary

A man and his wife go to their honeymoon hotel for their 25th anniversary. As the couple reflected on that magical evening 25 years ago, the wife asked the husband, "When you first saw my naked body in front of you, what was going through your mind?" The husband replied, "All I wanted to do was to fuck your brains out, and suck your tits dry." Then, as the wife undressed, she asked, "What are you thinking now?" He replied, "It looks as if I did a pretty good job."

A zombie is trying to get his kid to eat their dinner

"Eat your food, there's people in America with no brains at all"

I used to think the brain was the most important organ.

And then I thought, look what's telling me that.

Covid is not a joke and should be taken seriously

A former patient was so brain damaged afterwards, he wrongly believed he'd won an election he actually lost by millions of votes.

Steal everyone's eyelids and no one bats an eye

Remove their brains from their skulls and everyone loses their mind.