Iron

Why is it a bad idea to iron a four leaf clover?

Because you shouldn’t press your luck.

Know what’s ironic?

A computer asking me if I’m a robot.

Why is the barbarian carrying a skillet?

Wizard: Why is the barbarian carrying a skillet?

Bard: He thinks it's his spellcasting focus.

Wizard: He has spells?

Bard: Just one. Every time he hits someone with it, he shouts "Cast iron!"

What's black and screams like fuck?

Stevie Wonder answering the iron.

Thor, Iron Man and Hulk walk into IKEA...

Avengers... Assemble

A plane is about to crash

A female passenger gets up and frantically announces, "if I'm going to die, I want to die feeling like a woman."

She removes all her clothing and asks, "Is there someone on this plane who is man enough to make me feel like a woman?"

A man stands up, removes his shirt and says, "here iron this."

Co-worker asked me, "If Batman, who is a regular human but with gadgets, teamed up with Superman, who has supernatural powers, and they fought against Iron Man, another regular human with gadgets, who teamed up with Thor, who has super powers, who would be the winners?"

"Your parents when you move out."

The wife told me the cat had to be chipped.

I only have a nine iron but i still got it over the shed

The adjective for metal is metallic, but not so for iron.

Which is ironic.

My wife's star sign was cancer and it's quite ironic how she died really...

She was attacked by a giant crab.