Orgasm jokes

My wife of 15 years has just told me she has been faking her orgasms every time we've had sex.

I can't believe she lied to me, not once, but twice.

What did the gingerbread man say when he orgasmed?

IM CRUMBING!!!!

"You are the first woman that has ever given me an orgasm," I told the prostitute.

"That's not true," she replied.

"Of course it is," I laughed. "What do you mean?"

She said, "I'm a man."

'Involuntary Muscle Contraction'

A Professor was giving a lecture on 'Involuntary Muscle Contraction' to the first year medical students. This was not an exciting subject and the professor decided to lighten up the mood. He pointed to a young woman in the front row and asked, 'Do you know what your asshole is doing while you're having an orgasm?' She replied, 'Probably golfing with his buddies.’

Last night they held a seminar on how to withhold orgasms.

Nobody came.

Why is a woman's orgasm so much different from a man's?

Because her O varies.

What do you call a midget having an orgasm?

A shortcoming

When a woman buys a vibrator it's seen as a bit of naughty fun

But when a guy orders a 240 volt fuckmaster pro 5000 latex doll with high speed pulsating pussy, elasticised anus with non drip semen collection tray, together with optional built in realistic orgasm sound system, he gets called a pervert.

A woman goes to the doctor. “Please help. Every time I sneeze I have an orgasm.”

The doctor says “are you taking anything for it?”

The woman says “Yes. Pepper.”

Why do women fake orgasms?

Because they think we care.

What does a pulse and an orgasm have in common?

I don’t care if she has one.

I just had an orgasm that lasted six hours

It’s been a long time coming

I gave my girlfriend an orgasm last night.

The ungrateful bitch spat it out.