A Scotsman walks into a bedroom with a sheep on a leash and says...
"Honey, this is the cow I make love to when you have a headache."
The wife, lying in bed reading a book says, "If you weren't such an idiot, you'd know that's a sheep not a cow."
The man replies, "If you weren't such a presumptuous bitch, you'd realize I was talking to the sheep."
A sheep, a drum and a snake fell off a cliff.
BAA-DUMM-TSSS
A kindergarten teacher is teaching her class about animals...
She would hold ip a picture of the animal and the class would cry out in unison.
COW!
SHEEP!
When the teacher got to the deer the class was clueless.
"It has horns" She said
But the class was silent
"Sometimes your mom calls your dad this animal"
Little timmy throws his hands up and shouts, "IS IT A HORNY BASTARD?!"
A woman is reading a book in bed when her husband enters with a sheep under his arm
The husband holds the sheep up to the woman and exclaims: "This is the pig I'm cheating on you with."
The woman, confused by the notion, replies: "But... that's a sheep."
To which the husband shakes his head and says: "I wasn't talking to you."
How did the pervert find the sheep in the tall grass?
Very satisfying.
As a farmer, I love telling my dog sheep jokes,
But he'd herd them all.
A redneck sees another carrying a sheep under each arm.
So he asks him, "you shearing?" The other answers "nope, gonna fuck 'em both m'self."
A Scotsman and a Newfie were walking down the road when they saw a sheep with its head stuck in the fence.
"A'right! The perfect opportunity!" cried the Scotsman, who lifted his kilt and leapt on the backside of the sheep, shagging it furiously until he was satisfied.
Smiling, the Scotsman smoothed out his kilt and turned to the Newfie. "Go on," he said, "It's your turn."
"Okay!" said the Newfie, and stuck his head in the fence.
a welsh man was asked if he would have sex with a sheep for 1000$
the welsh man said "sure but under three conditions."
first, the sheep shouldn't have any diseases obviously
secondly, I don't want anyone i know to hear about this
and finally, give me a week to gather the 1000 dollars for you
An Eskimos car breaks down and a man from New Zealand pulls over to help him out. He has a look under the bonnet and says “looks like you’ve blown a seal” the Eskimo replies
“So what you f**k sheep”
Where do sheep get drunk in Boston?
At the baaaaa.
Thank you!
Just saw a sheep fight a cow
Looks like they were in a baaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaad mooooooooooooooooooooooooooood
Why do Scottish men wear kilts?
Because sheep can hear zippers.