German
A German is trying to to make his way to Paris
At the border, the French customs agent asks him
“Name?”
“Hans Mueller.”
“Place of residence?”
“Munich.”
“Occupation?”
“No, just vacation this time.”
Vacation jokes
Wife
According to my wife - vacation sex is the best sex ever.....
....that was a tough postcard to read!
Week
I just found out that i have two weeks to live
My wife just went on vacation
Japan
When I went to Japan on vacation, I didn't see a single ninja.
Impressive.
Middle East
What did I see while on vacation in the Middle-East?
I Saudi Arabian Desert.
Wife
A wife decided to leave for a vacation, leaving her husband in supervision of her mother and her cat.
After a few days, she called her husband and asked, “How is everything going?”
“The cat is dead,” he replied coldly.
She cried out and said, “You could have said the cat is playing on the roof on the first day, and the next day, it broke its leg, then the next that the poor thing’s dead!
No reply. The wife sighed sadly, “Anyways, how’s my mom?”
“She’s playing on the roof.”