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They say in every friend group there is 1 willing to commit murder

I killed the guy I suspected most before he could do any harm .

There are 3 unwritten rules of life.

1.

2.

3.

The spread of Covid 19 is based on 2 factors...

1) How dense the population is.

2) How dense the population is.

I just started a diet. Here's a recap of Day #1 - I removed all the fattening food from my house

It was delicious

I dont get it

If someone donates 1 kindey, they're hailed a hero, but I donate 5 and get arrested!?

A Girl was towelling her wet pussy. She enjoyed it so much that she began to rub it vigorously until

the pussy cried "Meow" and ran away.

Moral Lessons

1. Be kind to Animals

2. Always keep your thoughts clean...

I forgot how to write 1, 1000, 51, 6, and 500 in Roman numerals.

I’M LIVID.

The US should make DC, Guam, and PR states.

53 is a prime number.

Then we would truly be 1 nation, indivisible.

As a father I am granted 3 things in life:

1. I am allowed to have a dad bod. 2. I am allowed to make dad jokes. 3. I am a certified mother fucker.

99.9% of people are idiots

Fortunately, I belong in the 1% of intelligent people

Two monkeys entered a bath.

Monkey 1: Oooh oooh oooh aaah aaah aaah

Monkey 2: Calm down, it isn't that hot