Calendar jokes

Man

Man

a man goes to confess after 25 years

So the man walks into the confession booth for the first time in his adult life, having nothing but bad memories about it from when he was a child. So he opens the door, sits down and notices a couple of playboy nude calenders on the wall, a bottle of whiskey in the corner and a nice box of cigars next to it, and he thinks to himself "Wow, this place has really improved over the years"

But then the Father opens the door and yells "Get out! that's my booth!"

Brown stick

Brown stick

What is brown and sticky?

My Beyoncé calendar

Orphan

Orphan

Why are there only 363 days in an orphan's calendar? They don’t have Father's or Mother's Day.

Factory

Factory

I got fired from the Calendar Factory yesterday

They say it's because I took a day off

Guy

Guy

What happened to the 2 guys that stole a calendar?

They got 6 months each.

Day

Day

Sunday: Greg. Monday: Ian. Tuesday: Greg. Wednesday: Ian. Thursday: Greg. Friday: Ian. Saturday: Greg

So this is how the Gregorian calendar was created.

January

January

2020 has a new calendar out

January

February

Lockdown

December

Difference

Difference

Whats the difference between Me and a Calendar ?

a Calendar has dates.