Sub jokes

Vegan

Vegan

What's the difference between a vegan and a straight male submissive?

A vegan craves umami. A male sub craves "ooh mommy".

Ship

Ship

"Un, deux, trois, quatre", radioed the French ship...

...before it cinq.

"Eins, zwei, drei", radioed the German ship vierlessly, but then silence.

"Uno, dos", radioed the Spanish ship, and then disappeared without a tres.

"One," radioed the British ship before it went two.

"Won," radioed the American sub.

Documentary

Documentary

I saw a documentary about a submarine that recycles 87% of its garbage

But I think this sub's doing even better!

Girlfriend

Girlfriend

I finally got a girlfriend

If only I could post this in any other sub

Neighbor

Neighbor

A moderator of this sub is my neighbor in real life, and is demanding that my fence be removed

...just because I re-posted it.

Dog

Dog

what do you call an underwater dog?

a sub-woofer

Ring

Ring

If any one on this sub is thinking of getting married soon, please consider this carefully

On the one hand, you get to wear a pretty cool ring.

On the other hand, you don't.

Man

Man

A gay man and his male friend are hanging out at his house...

After a while of playing games, talking, and watching TV, the friend gets hungry. He turns to his gay buddy and asks:

"Hey, I am gonna order some subs, do you want any?"

The gay man replies: "No, sorry, I only do doms."

Boyfriend

Boyfriend

My boyfriend admitted to me that he's a dom

I always pegged him as a sub.

Speaker

Speaker

TIFU by plugging in the wrong speaker into my computer, causing a blackout in my neighbourhood

Whoops, wrong sub

Navy

Navy

TIL that you can get dishonorably discharged from the Navy for boarding the wrong vessel just once.

Whoops, wrong sub.

Can we ban "Yo Momma" jokes from this sub? They're old, stupid, and have been done by literally everyone hundreds of times

Just like yo mama