7 jokes

Soda

What size soda does Kim Jong-Un buy at 7-11?

A supreme liter.

Why was 6 afraid of 7?

Because 7 was black.

Chicken

from my 7 y/o: Why did the chicken cross the playground?

To get to the other slide

Friend

My friends call me 007 when i play call of duty with them.

0 Kills

0 Assist

7 Deaths

Beer bottle

A beer bottle, a mirror and a condom go to the pub.

The beer bottle thinks for a moment and says, “You know, if you break me, you get a years bad luck.” The mirror looks incredulous at this comment and says, “That’s nothing, if you break me you get 7 years bad luck.” The condom starts to laugh so hard he falls on the floor.

First Time

**My new girlfriend says that our first sexual experience should feel like a fairy tale.**

**I'm looking for 7 midgets to join us this evening. No weirdos please.**

Bill Gates

Bill Gates is pulled over by a police officer one night after his car is seen swerving on the highway

The police officer asks, "Have you had anything to drink tonight, sir?"

Bill says, "Absolutely not, officer."

The cop says, "Can you please count backwards from 10 for me?"

• ⁠

Bill replies, "10, 8, 7, Vista, XP, ME, 2000, NT, 98, 95, 3, 2, 1."

Robber

The first joke I made up at age 7 - found in my first grade journal

Q: Where do robbers go to the bathroom

A: Arrest-room

Man

Joke told in the Soviet Union

(For context only 1/7 Soviets owned a car, and once you paid up front there was a 10 year wait to get one)

A man walks into the car store wanting to buy a car. He pays the man at the counter and the man at the counter says “Alright, just come back in 10 years to pick one up.” The man replies “Morning or afternoon?” The dealer says “Well, 10 years from now what difference does it make?” The man replies “Well, the plumbers coming over in the morning.”