A guy goes in an Adult Store in Western Sydney and asks for an inflatable doll.
The guy behind the counter says, “Male or female ?”
The customer says, “Female.”
The counter guy asks, “Black or white?”
The customer says, “White.”
The counter guy asks, “Christian or Muslim?”
The customer says, “What does religion have to do with it?”
The counter guy says, “The Muslim one blows itself up.”
Chocolate is female
It uses her/she pronouns
Mark Zuckerberg's car hit a guy's car
Guy (angry) : Do you know who I am?
Mark : Yes, you are Scott Thomas, you have 237 friends out of which 37 are females and your wife doesn't know 12 of them. Last holiday you went to Thailand and there you . . .
Guy : Leave it bro, it was my fault.
Today, I got pulled over by a female cop.
I rolled down my window to ask what was wrong.
She said "NOTHING!"
My daughter asked me today:"Dad, What is sex?"
I had feared this moment would come and didn't think it would come this soon but nevertheless I was prepared. So I sat her down and explained it all. The birds and the bees, the different sexual orientations, all the positions and of course I had to mention all the STD's and the rules of safe sex. When I finished she looked at me shocked and confused: "So... which box should I check on this form? Male or Female?"
Czech and a Mexican
A Czechoslovakian and a Mexican go camping, while they were in the woods the Czech gets eaten by a bear. So the Mexican runs to find the park ranger and says "park ranger a bear ate my friend" The park ranger and the Mexican find two bears, a male and a female. The park ranger asked the Mexican which ate his friend he points to the male and the ranger kills him and guts him there are no remains of the Czech man in the bear. Moral of the story never trust a Mexican when he says the Check is in the male
What do you call a female turtle?
A clitortoise.
I went to an extremely attractive female doctor today for my annual checkup.
She told me that I had to quit masturbating. I asked why and she said, "Because I'm trying to examine you."
Why is every gender equality officer female?
Because it's cheaper.
A plane is about to crash
A female passenger gets up and frantically announces, "if I'm going to die, I want to die feeling like a woman."
She removes all her clothing and asks, "Is there someone on this plane who is man enough to make me feel like a woman?"
A man stands up, removes his shirt and says, "here iron this."
The reason for the wage gap is that men have high paying jobs like doctor, lawyer, etc. while women usually have lower paying jobs...
...like female doctor, female lawyer, etc.
I, for one, think it’d be hilarious if there were female pirates.
Wooden-tit?
Marvel Comics have announced a new female, Muslim superhero who can fly.
Which is handy, cause she's not allowed to drive.
Why did the female crocodile leave her husband?
He had a reptile dysfunction.
My son is a male trapped in a female's body, so we took him to a psychiatrist.
For some reason, the doc kicked us out when we told him our son was due in in 3 months.
Wife asked me what am I doing
Me: Killing Mosquitos Wife: How many have you killed?
Me: Total 5. 2 Female and 3 Male Wife: How did you know their gender?
Me: Three were near my beer bottle and two near my wallet
One day I'll pretend to be gay. I'll make lots of female friends, gain their trust. Become their confidant, and when they least expected...BAAM!!!
I'll have sex with their boyfriends
How can you differentiate male ants from female ants?
They're all female, otherwise they'd be called uncles
As a guy, I refuse to play as a female character in online games.
Not because I’m sexist, I just don’t think it’s right to perpetuate the stereotype that girls are bad at games.
The female janitor at my building asked if I would chill and smoke some weed with her
I said no. I can't deal with high maintenance women